Their Books Got 190+ Rejections. Then This Changed Everything

# Their Books Got 190+ Rejections. Then This Changed Everything. ![[images/Query-Successes.webp]] **Creator:** Alyssa Matesic · **Published:** 2026-10-05 · **Length:** 19:37 · [Watch on YouTube](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8) > Caption source: YouTube **English captions** (`en-orig`, auto-generated), downloaded with **yt-dlp** on the first try; they cover the whole video (0:00-19:37). No TubeAlfred or youtube-transcript-api credits were used. Section headings follow the creator's chapter timestamps. Screenshots are from the downloaded video stream. Names and titles are spelled as they appear in the query letters and QueryTracker interview excerpts shown on screen, where the auto-captions garbled them (for example "Herman Rue", "Francie", "Brit Bennett"). The "190+ rejections" in the title is not broken down in the video; the on-screen stats are 40 recorded rejections plus 19 no-responses for the first author, and dozens more across the second author's four books. ## Outline ### 0:00 Intro - [0:00](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=0s) Between a literary agency job and her own editing business, Matesic has read more than a thousand query letters. The ones that get interest all make an agent say yes to one question: **"Do I want to read this author's manuscript?"** - [0:15](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=15s) After her last query critique, viewers asked to see strong examples, so she'll break down two real letters that landed agents. - [0:30](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=30s) Both come from **QueryTracker's** database of successful query letters: more than 500 examples, filterable by genre, available with a free account (the listing is shown on screen). - [0:45](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=45s) Both are from this year and for **upmarket** novels, following up her recent video on how many agents want upmarket fiction. - [1:01](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=61s) Caveat: neither letter is perfect or follows every rule she teaches, but they did their job. At the end she'll name the one thing both do that matters more than any checklist item. ![[images/Query-Successes-t0005.webp]] ![[images/Query-Successes-t0040.webp]] ### 1:24 Query Letter 1 - [1:16](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=76s) QueryTracker interviews let authors share their querying journey. This author, **Nickey Woods**, shared full stats: **91 queries**, 40 rejections, 19 closed with no response (implied rejections), 32 withdrawn after she signed with her agent (Cindy), and four full requests, the fourth and last of which came from that agent. - [1:47](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=107s) To writers ready to quit after 15 queries: "I'm begging you not to." Had this author stopped that soon she'd never have found her agent. - [2:03](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=123s) Matesic reads the letter. Five years after her brother **Rod** vanished from an Oakland motel parking lot (while she waited with fries she'd saved for him), 11-year-old **Kiana Jones** is terrified of forgetting him; all she has left is the basketball he carried that day. - [2:34](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=154s) Kiana inherits his gift for the game, nurtured by neighbor Mae McCoy, and catches the eye of coach **Rodney Calhoun**, a former pro who, unknown to both of them, is Rod's biological father. Kiana's mother Michelle buried that truth and raised her children with an abusive man, **Eldridge Jones**, who has spent five years protecting his role in Rod's disappearance. - [3:37](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=217s) Kiana ends up "at the center of a collision between the man who knows what happened to Rod and the man who shares his eyes." - [3:52](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=232s) Metadata: ***What Remains of the Light***, a 92,000-word work of "upmarket literary fiction" set in Oakland, for readers of *The Mothers* by Brit Bennett and *Red at the Bone* by Jacqueline Woodson. Bio: associate dean for student life and community engagement and dean of students at USC Gould School of Law, former UCLA women's basketball player from Long Beach, with writing in the *Los Angeles Times*, academic journals, a Nickelodeon educational media campaign and a forthcoming Penn State Dickinson Law publication; it's her debut, and she has a completed legal thriller, *Placed*. ![[images/Query-Successes-t0095.webp]] ![[images/Query-Successes-t0225.webp]] ### 4:35 Why it works - [4:39](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=279s) It opens with the plot blurb rather than metadata (title, genre, word count), a perfectly valid choice when you aren't personalizing, and especially strong here because the first line is eye-catching: it sets up the protagonist's emotional conflict, a mystery and high stakes immediately. - [5:09](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=309s) Girls' basketball feels fresh (she hasn't read a novel about it), and it's integral to the plot, not a hobby, because the coach turns out to be the missing brother's father. "We want to pick up the book to see how this big secret will inevitably tumble out." - [5:40](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=340s) The Eldridge line adds something "juicy and sinister" with her own father. The blurb gives plenty of **specific plot details without giving too much away**, the balance you want. - [6:12](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=372s) The "collision" line is gorgeous phrasing that shows Kiana's crossroads and proves the writer can write. - [6:42](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=402s) The bio has **no creative writing credentials** (no MFA, no published fiction), only professional writing. That's proof you don't need them: be honest about who you are; for fiction the pitch and the manuscript matter most. - [7:14](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=434s) The UCLA basketball detail tells the agent she knows this world from the inside and can write it authentically. - [7:30](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=450s) Bottom line: an intriguing, specific, well-written blurb makes you want to read the story, and without a major red flag that's enough to get an agent into the pages. ![[images/Query-Successes-t0290.webp]] ### 7:57 Rules that it breaks - [7:45](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=465s) **Length:** about 481 words; she prefers 300 to 400, since agents read fast. Her trims: cut the "what frightens her most" line (implied), cut Mae McCoy (a secondary character, with five others already named), cut the last two blurb lines and end on the reworked "collision" line, and drop the legal-thriller mention from the bio (future books can be discussed once an agent is interested). - [9:03](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=543s) **Genre:** "upmarket literary fiction" mixes two terms writers often confuse; a novel is one or the other. Based on the plot she'd call it upmarket and cut "literary" (see her upmarket video). - [9:18](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=558s) **No personalization:** many agents don't care, so not a deal breaker, but one sentence is worth adding if you have a genuine reason, such as the agent representing an author you admire. - [9:50](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=590s) **Old comps**, probably the biggest rule broken: *The Mothers* (2016) and *Red at the Bone* (2019). Comps should be no more than about five years old to show the book fits what's being published now. - [10:20](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=620s) These were minor blips, not deal breakers: the story sounded interesting enough that agents wanted to read it, and the manuscript delivered. The plot blurb did all the heavy lifting. - [10:52](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=652s) Plug for her book *The Modern Guide to Querying Literary Agents*, co-written with QueryTracker's creator using data from more than 4 million queries. ![[images/Query-Successes-t0500.webp]] ![[images/Query-Successes-t0600.webp]] ### 11:15 Query Letter 2 - [11:07](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=667s) The second author, **Andrea Corsi**, had a multi-year journey and queried three other books first (on-screen stats: 23 queries for the first, which she rewrote after agent feedback at a conference; 54 for the second; 97 rejections for the third). That's common but rarely discussed: if your first book isn't working and you have a new idea, it may be worth pursuing. - [11:38](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=698s) Across all four books she sent **261 queries**, 87 for the book that landed her agent (she started querying it in July 2025 and got her offer in March 2026). - [11:53](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=713s) The letter opens with personalization, then ***The Relived Life of Herman Rue***, 92,000 words, with "the soft-hearted, curmudgeon and whimsy of Disney's *Up*," for fans of upmarket book club fiction and readers of *The Borrowed Life of Frederick Fife* by Anna Johnston and *Cassandra in Reverse* by Holly Smale. - [12:08](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=728s) "If grief were a home, Herman Rue is quite comfortable living in it." The 83-year-old widower visits his late wife Isla's grave, his coffee is bitter as his opinions, and his best friend Sammy teases that he's losing his marbles. Then he finds he can go back in time: all it takes is a picture and being where it was taken. - [12:39](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=759s) Reliving his best moments, he notices troubling details he missed and decides to "right the past." Then the present shifts: picture frames don't fit, and he now has a daughter, **Francie**, the child he and Isla longed for but a stranger to him. A house fire threatens to strand him in a world he can't fix unless he finds the source of his ability. - [13:42](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=822s) Bio: a former psychologist and lifelong reader of magical realism; published in *Adanna Literary Journal* and *Story Unlikely*, a contributor to *So God Made a Grandma*, long-listed in the 2024 Novel London Literary Competition; lives outside Philadelphia with her husband, two daughters and "two badly behaved cats." ![[images/Query-Successes-t0712.webp]] ![[images/Query-Successes-t0725.webp]] ### 14:16 The strengths - [14:12](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=852s) Unlike letter 1 it opens with personalization (a specific reason for each agent), then metadata and comps up front. She usually puts comps after the blurb, but upfront comps work if they give a strong sense of the premise. - [14:28](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=868s) The *Up* comp instantly conveys tone, themes and character, and it "all clicks" after the blurb. A movie comp works when paired with two recent novel comps, as here (2023 and 2024). - [14:59](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=899s) Her favorite part is the characterization: the grief line, the bitter coffee, the marbles, being 83, all delivered **without breaking voice**, which is very hard. The flat alternative ("a grieving, bitter widower losing his grip on reality") would flatten Herman instead of endearing him to us. - [15:46](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=946s) A **textbook upmarket premise**: a high-concept hook (a widower time traveling through old photos) plus an emotional exploration of identity and family. The surprise daughter blurs memory and fantasy. - [16:19](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=979s) The bio is solid: psychology is relevant to a book about a fractured mind, and the publications and contest placement show creative writing ability, "the cherry on top," not a requirement. ![[images/Query-Successes-t0940.webp]] ### 16:36 What I would change - [16:34](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=994s) Her biggest note: the conflict needs **specificity**. "Troubling details" like what? Right what? Why does time travel get harder? One concrete example would sharpen the middle, such as: he realizes he shut Isla down every time she raised adopting, so he's the real reason they never had a family. - [17:07](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=1027s) A tangible detail would also tighten it; this one also runs long, at about 460 words. - [17:23](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=1043s) A small grammatical stumble in the first paragraph should read: "It has the soft-heartedness, curmudgeon and whimsy of Disney's *Up*, perfect for fans of upmarket, book club fiction, and would appeal to readers who enjoyed..." Agents won't red-pen you, but avoid typos so they don't trip. ![[images/Query-Successes-t1010.webp]] ![[images/Query-Successes-t1060.webp]] ### Conclusion (about 17:53) - [17:53](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=1073s) Neither letter worked by following every rule. Both introduce compelling protagonists, set up a mystery, nail the balance of enough detail without too much, and leave us wanting more: What happened to Rod, and how will the fathers' conflict play out? What does Herman uncover, who is Francie, and does he get stuck in the past? - [18:40](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=1120s) Those answers come only from reading the manuscript, and that is a query letter's entire job. Even strong letters collect plenty of rejections, so a rejection doesn't mean your query is broken; sometimes the agent just wasn't the right one. - [19:10](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCD7bYL6PP8&t=1150s) Next, watch the video where she and her co-author go through two real query letters line by line for red flags. "Happy querying." ![[images/Query-Successes-t1100.webp]] ![[images/Query-Successes-t1150.webp]] ## Things mentioned ### Books - ***What Remains of the Light*** by **Nickey Woods**: 92,000-word upmarket novel set in Oakland (query letter 1; her debut) - ***Placed***: Woods's completed legal thriller set at an elite law school, mentioned in her bio - ***The Relived Life of Herman Rue*** by **Andrea Corsi**: 92,000-word upmarket book club novel with time travel through photographs (query letter 2) - ***The Mothers*** by **Brit Bennett** (2016) and ***Red at the Bone*** by **Jacqueline Woodson** (2019): letter 1's comps, which Matesic calls too old - ***The Borrowed Life of Frederick Fife*** by **Anna Johnston** (2023) and ***Cassandra in Reverse*** by **Holly Smale** (2024): letter 2's novel comps - ***So God Made a Grandma***: anthology Corsi contributed to - ***The Modern Guide to Querying Literary Agents*** by **Alyssa Matesic** with QueryTracker's creator, built on data from more than 4 million queries ### Films - ***Up*** (Disney/Pixar): letter 2's movie comp for tone and whimsy ### Organizations, publications and services - **QueryTracker** and its database of 500+ successful query letters with author interviews - **USC Gould School of Law**, **UCLA** women's basketball, the ***Los Angeles Times***, **Nickelodeon**, **Penn State Dickinson Law**: from Woods's bio - ***Adanna Literary Journal***, ***Story Unlikely***, and the **2024 Novel London Literary Competition** long list: from Corsi's bio - **Query Academy** query reviews and the **Chapter Break** newsletter (description) ### Craft and querying concepts - The one question every query must answer yes to: does the agent want to read the manuscript? - Opening with the plot blurb versus metadata versus personalization - Specific plot details without giving too much away; a stakes-setting first line - Ideal query length of 300 to 400 words; trimming secondary characters and future-book mentions - Upmarket versus literary fiction (pick one) - Comps no more than about five years old; a movie comp paired with recent book comps - Creative writing credentials are optional; relevant life experience in the bio adds authenticity - Characterizing a protagonist without breaking voice - High-concept hook plus emotional exploration as the upmarket formula - Implied rejections (no response); querying several books before landing an agent; persistence past the first 15 queries ### Links from the description - Querying guide on Amazon: https://amzn.to/46xIHhp - Query letter reviews: https://www.queryacademy.com - Work with her on your story: https://www.alyssamatesic.com/inquire#inquire-2 - Free Story Self-Assessment: https://www.alyssamatesic.com/#freebie-form - Newsletter **Chapter Break**: https://www.chapter-break.com/ - Related videos: "My Query Letter Formula That Got Book Deals" (https://youtu.be/lt33qijbsyk), [[Everyone Loves This Genre. But No One Is Writing It]] (https://youtu.be/BxU0E1sh1XI), [[You Sent Me Your Query Letters…They ALL Would Get Rejected]] (https://youtu.be/e_Vsz09AWdY) - Music credit: *Charlie Brown* by Smith The Mister (https://smiththemister.bandcamp.com) ## Biographies ### Alyssa Matesic Professional book editor with more than a decade of experience at Big Five publishing houses and literary agencies; in this video she notes she has read more than a thousand query letters between agency work and her own editing business. She co-wrote *The Modern Guide to Querying Literary Agents* with QueryTracker's creator, runs Query Academy query reviews and the newsletter **Chapter Break**. (Sources: this video and its description.) ### Nickey Woods Author of the query for *What Remains of the Light*. Per her bio as shown in the video, she is associate dean for student life and community engagement and dean of students at USC Gould School of Law, a former UCLA women's basketball player who grew up in Long Beach, California, with professional writing in the *Los Angeles Times*, academic journals and a Nickelodeon educational campaign. She queried 91 agents before signing with an agent named Cindy. (Source: the letter and QueryTracker interview excerpt shown on screen.) ### Andrea Corsi Author of the query for *The Relived Life of Herman Rue*. A former psychologist and reader of magical realism who lives outside Philadelphia; published in *Adanna Literary Journal* and *Story Unlikely*, a contributor to *So God Made a Grandma*, and long-listed in the 2024 Novel London Literary Competition. She queried three earlier books from 2023 to 2025 and sent 261 queries in total before getting an offer of representation in March 2026. (Source: the letter and QueryTracker interview excerpts shown on screen.) ### Brit Bennett, Jacqueline Woodson, Anna Johnston and Holly Smale Authors of the comp titles named in the two letters: Bennett's *The Mothers*, Woodson's *Red at the Bone*, Johnston's *The Borrowed Life of Frederick Fife* and Smale's *Cassandra in Reverse*. The video gives only the titles and publication years. (Source: this video.)